“Could God Even Fix This Marriage?”

“For her, the only thing that would fix everything was divorce.”

Michael Rivera and his wife, Elizabet, grew up in church together and married when they were still teenagers. Michael joined the U.S. military and became a commissioned officer in the Air Force. They’d been together eleven years, when in 2013, Michael was sent on a six-month deployment 10 time zones away and had an affair.

“I thought nobody’s gonna find out,” Michael recalls. “This is just while I'm here and after I leave, it's, it's over with, you know, and I can go back to being me and having a normal life.”

However, when he got home, things didn’t go back to normal.

“I had asked God for forgiveness many times,” says Michael. “And I knew that he had forgiven me, but I still felt that I was surrounded by a wall.”

Elizabet noticed a change in him. “Something was different, and I didn't know what it was. When I asked him, he was very evasive.”

Three months later, Michael was away for explosives training when Elizabet discovered messages revealing the affair. She called Michael to confront him.

He remembers that conversation. “The house of glass that I was living in shattered. I know what I did is wrong, but I want to still keep my wife; I want to keep my marriage. I still loved her, that never changed. I told her that I was sorry. I asked her to forgive me, but from that, it just went to arguing.”

“He took responsibility for his actions,” Elizabet recalls. “But I told him, you know, this is the end. This is a deal breaker. I was very angry, very upset, so I requested an appointment with a divorce lawyer.”
The divorce attorney recommended couples therapy, yet they continued to fight constantly. so, Elizabet left for Puerto Rico to stay with her parents.
“I was hurt, I was bitter, I was angry. I thought that was the best decision for both of us. I didn't want the baby to witness our constant fights.”

Michael was “I didn't want to continue to hurt her. So, whatever she wanted, I was fine with--whatever would make her feel better.”

Elizabet returned four months later. though they continued therapy, things didn’t change.
“I was determined to have the therapy, but I was determined to end the marriage,” she declares.

For nearly a year, they continued to struggle. Michael devoted himself to prayer and sought God constantly. Then he read a passage that changed his life.

‘“I came across the 32nd Psalm, which helped me understand that part of the process had to be confession. I knew that the perception that I had of, of not telling people everything because I will let them down, I knew that that had to pretty much go out the window. I had to change. I had to be a different person. I went to people that I trusted, and I told 'em, ‘Hey, this is what I'm going through,’ and I fully confessed to them. Becoming an open book was such a difficult thing for me, but it, it was truly what transformed me. I didn't care what people would think about me at this point. I was genuinely doing whatever I could to truly restore our marriage.”’

However, Elizabet still couldn’t get past her hurt and disappointment.

‘“This experience changed me. The love I'd had for him was blinded by my anger. I didn't feel, proud of him anymore. I remember him telling me, ‘Elizabet, I love you. Please forgive me.’ And he was all crying. And I was cold.”’

Michael was ready to give up. “I was thinking at that point, I'm gonna end the marriage because I just can't live. I mean, I can't take what I did back.”

Soon after, Elizabet had a vision.

“‘I saw bright light, and then I saw Jesus standing in front of my bed, and his shape was like living water. I grabbed his hand, and I remember telling him, ‘I love you.’ What I meant by that is, I love you, but I know I don't love him. And I remember Jesus telling me, “If you love him, then you love me.’”

 The next day, their pastor requested that Elizabet, who was on the worship team at church, perform a new song that Sunday about seeing Christ in others. Elizabet remembers it clearly.
‘“This song was a confirmation of the vision that I had. The lyrics of this song showed me that I had to start looking at Michael through God’s eyes. That completely changed me. It broke me inside. And I remember at one point, God ministering in my heart and telling me, ‘You don't have to trust Michael, but you can trust me.’ I began to pray for Michael. I began to see him with mercy and even with empathy. God began to open my heart again toward Michael, and I started loving him again, but loving him in a realistic way.’”

Elizabet wrote a letter telling Michael she wanted to try to make their marriage work. It was the answer he had been praying for, and with God’s help, they began to repair the damage.
“Forgiveness for me was not a one-time thing, it was a process,” says Elizabet. “It was a decision that I had to make constantly. My weakness was my anger, and I needed forgiveness too. So different kinds of weaknesses, but we need the same mercy.”

The following year, they renewed their vows, moved into a new home and had their second child. Their love –and their family—continued to grow.

“We have far exceeded everything and anything that we had before,” says Michael. “It is totally a new marriage. I'm not boastful about anything I did in my past. But I want people to understand that there is a God that wants to restore us. He wants to restore our life.”

Elizabet agrees.

“Jesus can make everything new. If you surrender completely to him-- you surrender your sorrow, your pride, your ego to him--He will do the work, and He will do the miracle in your life.”
 

CREDITS

Story lead courtesy of Delafé testimonies, building the world’s largest archive of Jesus testimonies: https://www.missiondelafe.org