A Champion for the Children Left Behind

CHAOTIC YOUTH

Tori had one of the most tumultuous childhoods that any kid could have. She was conceived when her mother was raped, and never knew her father. Tragically, her mom also battled mental illness, abused drugs, and exposed Tori to multiple boyfriends, drug raids, frequent moves, and in time, verbal and physical abuse.

While she’s forever grateful to her mom for giving her life, and parenting the best she could, Tori’s forthcoming about what life was like. “By nine years old, I was practiced at dealing with emergencies and familiar with hospitals. Mom had … a few mental breakdowns, and at least one suicide attempt that she had to be hospitalized for,” she reveals. When Tori was 13, social workers finally removed her from her mother’s home and assigned her to the foster care system.

Little did Tori know that she would live in a total of 12 foster homes before she was emancipated at age 18. She found life in the foster care system to be a volatile mix of good and bad influences. “I wanted to stay with all of them to some degree,” she says. “It feels like nobody wants you, that you don’t belong.”  

Tori says she often felt lonely, desperate, sad, and anxious. On the other hand, in some homes she felt very cared for and loved. At one point, she lived in a residential group home, where she received help to process her mixed emotions. It was there she started reading the Bible. To cope through those years, Tori regularly wrote in a journal, and took part in therapy, a mandatory part of foster care life, she says. In middle school, she also joined the track and field team, and worked hard academically, which provided healthy outlets.    

FINDING HOPE 

Amidst the tumult of Tori’s life, there were also kind people along the way. They showed her love, told her about God, and gave her hope. In her fourth foster home, the couple treated her like one of their own, included her in their Christmas card photo, a big deal to Tori.

In her 12th and last home, when Tori was 17, she lived with a woman who modeled God’s love, and encouraged her to grow in her faith. “Gigi believed in me, and helped me set goals. It was her love and in the church we attended that I changed and healed a lot.” That’s when Tori came to faith in Christ. It was also during those high school years that she became a four-time state champion in track and field. Her success resulted in a track scholarship, which, when combined with an academic scholarship, provided a full ride for her at Hillsdale College.

The person who made perhaps the most profound difference in her life is her high school track coach, Scott Wichman, who became a father figure. “Though a quiet man, a factory worker, he spoke words of life to me, giving so much of his time to train and mentor me. He knew the Lord much better than I did,” she says. “He always viewed and treated me so purely as his daughter, calling me what he called his own biological daughters, 'Sweetheart.' His rewriting of my identity to show me that what God in heaven said about me was also true on earth, changed the trajectory of my life. I began to see and believe more in myself as God did.”

Growing up, Tori had struggled with anger at God for not giving her a father. When she became emancipated at age 18, she went to live with Scott and his family, and he gave her away at her wedding in 2018. He filled the father role in her life, and remains her “dad” to this day.   

Tori is very transparent about her life experiences, as well as the process of healing from the pain. Now age 26, she says that recovery is a journey that isn’t over. She’s benefitted from therapy and medication and knows that there’s more work to do. “For so long I thought I could become strong enough to handle it. If I just prayed more, trusted God more, and grew my faith, God would take the triggers away. And that’s even what I heard from voices in the church. It’s been about twelve years since I’ve lived with Mom and eight years since I’ve come to know Jesus, and though I know He can heal me of my trauma, He hasn’t done so fully.” She confidently trusts that her healing will continue and one day be complete, by the grace of God.  

POURING INTO OTHERS 

Tori met Jacob in her senior year at Hillsdale, and they married not long after graduation in 2018. They both have hearts to help others, including adoption and foster care. The Petersens have a son, Leyonder, a daughter, Ezzeri, and an adopted young adult son, Sar, from Liberia, who now lives in Texas. The couple has also provided a home for foster children and many guests. In 2020, Tori also began a ministry called Beloved Initiative, to “amplify the voices of those who feel voiceless.”

Through social media and retreats (two thus far), the aim is to teach kids in need, e.g. human trafficking survivors, foster kids, and victims of abuse, their true identity in Christ, and how to do more than merely survive this life, but to thrive.