Karen

Tyner

Contributing Writer

Karen Tyner has been an attorney for over 25 years. For 12 of those years, she did things her way and created a messy heart along the way. But Jesus rescued her from that stubborn independence one October day. In 2015, Jesus asked Karen to write her stories, especially the many lessons He has taught her since that fateful day she opened her heart’s door and fell into His arms.

More from Karen Tyner

Laughter through Tears

We walked into the quiet room. Her shaky hand clutched my sweaty palm. Red-rimmed eyes briefly glanced up from the cheerfully colored chairs. Flower-covered tissue boxes dotted the landscape.

While my mother and I sat with joined hands, we wished we were anywhere else. But this meeting was important to us—we wanted to hear how others coped with the “C” word.

“Welcome to the cancer support group,” announced the bubbly group leader. Stiff smiles were carved on faces in response.

One woman had pancreatic cancer. Stomach cancer afflicted a 25-year-old man. Mom had recently been diagnosed with stage-four breast cancer. Other patients whispered their names but didn’t share much.

During the meeting, we all grieved at how cancer robs patients and caregivers of freedom and joy.

The young family facing pancreatic cancer wanted to visit Disney World but felt imprisoned by a morphine pump.

Mom and I wanted to travel to see family but we were concerned about being 200 miles from her doctor.

We felt trapped—straying too far from the medical team wasn’t an option.

The group leader disagreed. She asked about the desires of each patient and gently pointed out that life continues beyond the doctor’s door. After the meeting, the leader scheduled a doctor’s appointment in Orlando so the young family could enjoy a trip to Disney. A physician in North Carolina received Mom’s records so that we could travel there without worry.

The 25-year-old man’s attitude proved the most positive and contagious. Cancer had not been kind to his family—his stomach cancer had returned after months of silence and his mother had passed away from cancer years earlier. Despite this sad news, he smiled and laughed during the meeting. His outlook echoed the words of King Solomon:

“A time to cry and a time to laugh.” (Ecclesiastes 3:4 A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) , NLT)

Cancer is hard on the family and the patient. But he challenged our little group to laugh daily and enjoy life by living today without worrying about the future.

God opened my eyes that night. I realized that while cancer was robbing my mother of energy and her hair, I was the one stealing her laughter and freedom by clinging tightly to a rigid schedule and worrying about the future. I wanted her to stay home all day and sleep. Having fun was off-limits.

But Mom had other plans. After our first meeting, she decided to follow Jesus’ declaration:

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” (Matthew 6:34 "So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) , NLT)

She met two wonderful ladies through church. They drank coffee and ate lunch together, and laughed at silly jokes many afternoons. Mom stopped worrying about the future and started to enjoy each day God gave her. She turned the heavy-lifting over to God.

The next month when we returned to the support group, smiles had replaced tears. The pancreatic cancer patient had gone to Disney with her family and beautiful memories were made.

Mom and I had traveled to see family—we laughed and told old stories. Driving home we attracted stares from many drivers as Mom frequently stuck her bald head out of the window. Our worry-free laughter sounded better than any music.

God wants us to enjoy our families and our lives this side of heaven. He used that 25-year-old cancer patient to show me that true joy is found when we appreciate each day with family as a gift from Him and we leave our burdens at His feet.

Maybe you’ve recently received devastating health or financial news, or a tragedy has struck your family. It’s hard to not worry about the future when life is spinning fast. But my prayer is that you will find freedom and joy when you release your worries to Jesus.

Trusting God's Maps

"Turn right in 500 feet."

"Recalculating."

"Your destination is on the right."

I use a GPS device as a map, especially when traveling to a new place. After I type in the address, the female voice starts navigating. Of course, she first guides me down the driveway, then through my neighborhood, then out of the city. She starts one turn at a time.

I blindly trust the digital navigator to help me reach my destination safely and on time.

Why can’t I be that way with God?

I want God to show me His mapped-out plans for me in advance before I back the car out of the driveway and proceed on this adventure called life.

I must admit, sometimes I trust my GPS more than I trust God’s plans for me.

I don’t question the digital navigator, just God. I don’t need to know which roads the GPS will take me on, but I want to know all the turns in advance from God. Negotiate with the GPS? Rarely. Negotiate with God? Oh yes!

The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life, I will advise you and watch over you” (Psalms 32:8 The LORD says, "I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) NLT).

"You can make many plans, but the Lord’s purpose will prevail" (Proverbs 19:21 You can make many plans, but the LORD's purpose will prevail. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) NLT).

I read these and other verses; and I get it — God’s ways, plans, and thoughts for me are better than anything I could dream up.

But my brain just wants a little peek at the path God is taking me on. Okay, more than a little peek. I want to know every detail. Especially the ending.

In the Bible, we learn of two great men: Moses and Abraham. God gave each man an assignment, but their reactions to God’s requests were different.

God asked Moses to return to Egypt and free the Israelites. But Moses said he was inadequate so he asked God to send someone else (Exodus 4:1-17 But Moses protested again, "What if they won't believe me or listen to me? What if they say, `The LORD never appeared to you'?" Then the LORD asked him, "What is that in your hand?" "A shepherd's staff," Moses replied. "Throw it down on the ground," the LORD told him. So Moses threw down the staff, and it turned into a snake! Moses jumped back. Then the LORD told him, "Reach out and grab its tail." So Moses reached out and grabbed it, and it turned back into a shepherd's staff in his hand. "Perform this sign," the LORD told him. "Then they will believe that the LORD, the God of their ancestors—the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob—really has appeared to you." Then the LORD said to Moses, "Now put your hand inside your cloak." So Moses put his hand inside his cloak, and when he took it out again, his hand was white as snow with a severe skin disease.* "Now put your hand back into your cloak," the LORD said. So Moses put his hand back in, and when he took it out again, it was as healthy as the rest of his body. The LORD said to Moses, "If they do not believe you and are not convinced by the first miraculous sign, they will be convinced by the second sign. And if they don't believe you or listen to you even after these two signs, then take some water from the Nile River and pour it out on the dry ground. When you do, the water from the Nile will turn to blood on the ground." But Moses pleaded with the LORD, "O Lord, I'm not very good with words. I never have been, and I'm not now, even though you have spoken to me. I get tongue-tied, and my words get tangled." Then the LORD asked Moses, "Who makes a person's mouth? Who decides whether people speak or do not speak, hear or do not hear, see or do not see? Is it not I, the LORD? Now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say." But Moses again pleaded, "Lord, please! Send anyone else." Then the LORD became angry with Moses. "All right," he said. "What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he speaks well. And look! He is on his way to meet you now. He will be delighted to see you. Talk to him, and put the words in his mouth. I will be with both of you as you speak, and I will instruct you both in what to do. Aaron will be your spokesman to the people. He will be your mouthpiece, and you will stand in the place of God for him, telling him what to say. And take your shepherd's staff with you, and use it to perform the miraculous signs I have shown you." OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) ). On the other hand, Abraham didn’t hesitate in responding to God’s command to sacrifice his son, Isaac. (Genesis 22:0 OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) ).

Moses tried to negotiate with God, but Abraham did not.

I’m more like Moses — send someone else unless you can show me all the obstacles I’ll face and promise me there will be a happy ending.

I want to be more like Abraham. Listen, trust, obey.

What do we learn from these two men? Trust in God’s timing. Trust in God’s plans. When we hear a call from God to do something, step out in faith and be obedient. Believe that God will be with us every step of the way. We don’t need to know every bend and twist in the road — simply trust Him as Savior and guide.

God is also teaching us we shouldn’t make a list of all the reasons we think God made a mistake in choosing us. Remember, God uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things. He chooses us because of our gifts and passions. He wants those things to be used for His Kingdom, not kept locked inside our comfortable living room.

Listen. Leap one step at a time. Trust Him completely. God’s loving, non-digital voice will guide us through the traffic, over the bridges, and around each turn on this journey called Obedience.