What It Means to Forgive
CALM BEFORE THE STORM
Dawn Spicer was the youngest of three girls living in a Christian home in Virginia Beach. Her family attended First Baptist Norfolk Church, where her father taught Sunday school. At the age of 7, she gave her life to Christ.
Through her teen years, Dawn knew how to pretend things were good while feeling empty and worthless. She went through a rebellious stage but eventually got her life right with the Lord.
While attending college, she met Jeremy, and they hit it off. After college, they married and had twin boys three years later. Life was perfect. Until it wasn't.
While attending Oak River Church, they were very involved in ministry with Dawn leading worship and women’s ministry. During that time, she and Jeremy were struggling to keep up the business of life.
Dawn explains, “I saw myself as never being good enough. I never was confident in anything. I always felt like I had ‘mom-guilt' - I could do something better. And as a wife, I felt like I could do better. I felt like Jeremy deserved better. It was nothing that anyone else was making me feel like, it was my own insecurities."
WRECKED TO RESTORED
Dawn’s best friend and their families were very close. Not only did they live right by each other, they also attended the same church where Dawn and her best friend’s husband led worship together.
Over time, one inappropriate text turned into another. Then, boundaries were crossed that shouldn’t have been which eventually turned into an affair. “A foothold becomes a stronghold. You start to reason all your actions out so it makes it ok in your mind. Then you completely let your guard down and any voice of reason goes out the window. Things you never thought you’d do, you’re doing. Places you never thought you’d go, you are going. And somehow in that deceived mind of yours, everything is ok,” Dawn shares.
Three months later, while confiding her hidden sin to a friend, hoping she would take Dawn’s side, it didn’t go as planned. Her friend told Dawn to end the affair or she would tell their pastor. Terrified, embarrassed, and ashamed, Dawn was forced to deal with her sin. She admits that telling Jeremy was the hardest part. He was on a mission trip and she had to wait a week to tell him face-to-face. Dawn explains, “It wasn’t until I saw my husband completely broken, unable to physically get up, that I realized the depth of what I had done. It was at that point that I fell flat on my face and confessed to the Lord and was completely broken and surrendered everything to the Lord.”
Jeremy and Dawn began marital counseling and Jeremy eventually forgave her. Today, 10 years later, they are doing great and Dawn is involved in ministry again. “There is freedom in surrender. It’s hard, but that’s how you find freedom,” she explains.
In her book, Even Still, Dawn candidly shares her story. She wrote the book to help others trapped in sin find freedom. She also wants to educate those around those who are broken to learn how to respond and help them experience restoration. “I believe one of the highest callings God can ask of us is walking through the mud with someone,” she explains. The church was so vital in helping Dawn walk through the process from repentance to restoration.
Now, she wants to do the same for those struggling. Dawn says, “No matter what you are going through whether it is a marriage struggle, whether it is a job struggle, whatever bad choices, whatever it is that you’re going through the Lord can heal that, the Lord can redeem that, and the Lord will use it.”
For more information on Dawn Spicer click the Link!
To purchase the Kindle version of Even Still click the Link!
CREDITS
Author, Even Still (self-published, 2024); BA in Religion: Christian Ministries, Liberty Univ.; speaker; married to Jeremy for over 22 years; twin boys, Kaden & Laden, attending Liberty Univ