One False Word and He Chose Street Life

Todd recalls, “You would do anything for it including hurting family members, hurting friends, I mean, even breaking the law. There was nothing that I wouldn't do for it.”

It was one bad decision that would send Todd Loudon on a 26-year journey into the world of drugs, as a dealer, and addict trying to bury the pain of unfulfilled dreams.  

Todd shares, “It was a shock to me that with one simple act, I could throw away, I mean, my whole future.”

Todd never knew his real dad. He grew up with his mother and a physically and verbally abusive step-father.

Todd says, “He was violent with me, violent with my mom, and I just got sick of it. I didn't want to deal with it anymore.”

By high school Todd had moved out, gotten a job and decided becoming a pharmacist would help him and his mom escape. One mistake would change that plan. He was a junior when a state trooper caught him smoking pot. Suspended from school, he was assigned a case worker.

Todd remembers, “She told me basically that I just threw away my whole future and I remember sitting in that chair just being devastated. That's when I rebelled and I just made a decision that I was still going to be a pharmacist, just an illegal one.”

It wasn’t long before Todd was climbing the ranks of the local drug scene. And it wasn’t long before he was spending his profits to support what had become a full-blown addiction to meth.

Todd says, “I knew I was going down a bad road, even the wrong road, but at that point I really couldn't stop. Not on my own. So I kept pursuing it, kept pursuing the money, kept pursuing the drugs, the lifestyle, all of it.”

By his early 20’s Todd was in a dangerous, dark world of high stakes drug dealing, filled with money, violence, and the fear that any day could be his last. Todd remembers when his suppliers held him face down on the ground with a .38 to his head and took his money.

Todd remembers, “I could feel the weight of the gun. I could feel how cold it was, and then at the last minute one of the guys yelled to the man with the gun, he said, ‘You promised not to hurt him.’ And I remember thinking in my head, ‘This is what you wanted, was all this worth it?’ I began to really question everything. Question how I could be here?”

Even that wasn’t enough for Todd to change his course. For the next 20 years he would be immersed in the crime world, living in constant fear of powerful drug lords, or being captured by police, all while hopelessly addicted. Three times he was sent to prison for drug related crimes and probation violations. He also went to rehab twice and got sober but couldn’t stay that way.

Finally, in 2006 at 39 years old Todd shares, “I had reached the point in my addiction and in my life, where I started just to cry out to God. I just asked God to make a way for me.” And Todd says He did two weeks after that prayer. He was arrested and found guilty of racketeering, which could earn him 10 years in prison. He remembers sitting in jail waiting sentencing.

Todd remembers, “I had reached the point in my life where I was just disgusted with everything, with my addiction, with what my life had become, and I reached that point of surrender. And I began to cry out to God, asking God to forgive me. And as I started praying to Him and pleading with Him I just heard in my heart and in my mind, Him saying ‘Come. Come.’ And I said, ‘Yes, yes, yes, Lord.’ And suddenly I was flooded with this peace and it felt like this huge weight had been lifted from me, this huge rock. And I was still crying, but now these were tears of relief, tears of joy. I knew in that instant that I was done with my addiction. I knew that it was over. Not only with the drugs, but this running. Running from God, running my whole life I'd spent running, running away from God.”

Sentenced to 8 years, Todd spent his time behind bars learning about God and his identity in Jesus.

Todd says, “I was in the Word for hours every day. I was communicating with God. I was praying with God. I was learning, I was growing, I was healing from everything in my past.”

In 2010, Todd was released on parole on good behavior serving only 5 ½ years of his sentence. Four years later, he married Lisa and they have a 6-year daughter. Today, Todd is a director that spends his time helping men at a residential ministry transition back into society. Todd encourages everyone struggling with addiction to trust Jesus to change their life.

Todd shares, “God gives us a choice each day. You can choose death, or you can choose life. But once you involve God, that changes everything. It's no longer a hopeless situation. Pursue a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Watch what will happen."