Knowing the True Nature of God

Steven remembers, “And I was just about to pull the trigger and kill him. A light comes on in the house across the street. So, in that second, he turns around, he sees the gun trained at his head. He is terrified.”

Steven Spellman had known nothing but abandonment, rejection, anger and violence. His mom, a crack addict, left him and his brother in a hotel room when he was 11, and never returned. His dad had long since left, leaving the two brothers to the foster care system.

Steven shared, “If my mother didn't want me and my dad didn't care about me, certainly God wouldn't, nobody else would. It didn't hurt me that no one loved me. I didn't expect love. I was worthless.”

And now at 17 years old and selling drugs to put himself through community college, he pulled a gun on a police officer investigating a crime in a neighborhood. Steven was ready to face the consequences.

Steven recalls, “So we're standing in the stalemate, 'put your gun down, drop it. You drop your gun,” yelled the officer.

Lying on the street and bleeding from three gunshot wounds, Steven thought about one of his foster mothers, Ms. Francis, who read the Bible to him and was the only person to ever show he mattered.

Steven says, “When she talked to me, I wasn’t a burden. That’s the thing I remember most. I was wanted. And she would tell me, it’s because God wants you. As I stared up at the stars, I said to the Lord, ‘I’m coming home. Save my soul. But don’t let me live. Don’t let me wake up.’ He answered my prayer and didn’t answer the next one; He saved my soul and He let me live.”

The wounds would cost Steven 40% of his right lung, two ribs that were removed, and a bullet lodged in his spine that left Steven confined to a wheelchair. Steven would spend four years in federal prison for his crimes. He used that time reading his Bible and getting to know his newfound savior. Even then, the voices of his past continued to plague him, leaving him little hope that God would heal him.

Steven shares, “I was to suffer through hell on my way to heaven. And I was just grateful that I was going to heaven instead of hell.”

After Steven was released from prison, he married his teenage sweetheart, Susanne, and they soon had two daughters. Steven’s inability to hold a job because of his disability opened the door to depression. Susanne, a CNA, began working 16-hour shifts. Still, she loved her husband and did what she could.

Susanne recalls, “I couldn’t encourage him. He was depressed. His countenance was low. I was always praying that the Lord would heal him.”

At the suggestion of his wife, Steven started writing and he also took care of their two daughters. By the summer of 2019, Steven, now 39 years old and overweight, could only walk short distances with the aid of a cane. So he began taking martial arts classes to strengthen his body and for self-defense. One day, his instructor, Scott, prayed for God to heal him. Something Steven had long given up on.

Steven remembers, “'So, like, do you feel anything? Has anything changed?' And I told him, 'no.' He began to ask me, ‘Well, what is your relationship like with God? How do you see your savior?’ And I told him, 'My savior is a harsh task master. And I am a tool in His toolkit and not a particularly well-kept tool.'”

Scott’s wife, Lynn, who was also there, spoke up. Steven recalled, “'No. You are beloved of God. His thoughts towards you are more than the grains of sand upon the sea. He knew you before you were ever born.' That resonated with me in a way that was spiritual.”

Scott prayed again. And then…Steven shares, “I lifted my cane above my head and I'm looking in astonishment. So the pain is gone.”

He told Susanne about how God healed him.

Susanne remembers, “I would see him walking around and he was standing taller, and he wasn't using his cane. I had my husband back full of life again.”

Eventually, Steven was fully mobile and began working at Scott’s martial arts studio. He also continued writing which allowed Susanne to quit her job and stay home to take care of her family like she always wanted. Then, three years after his healing, Steven went to get x-rays.

Steven recalls, “And she was like, ‘Your right lung, the one you claim was 40% removed is more robust. The two ribs you claim are removed are more robust than the others.’ So, I asked her what is the significance of the...this bullet? And she was like, ‘your spinal column has calcified around it. It's like rebar now. Your spinal column is actually stronger because of it.’”

Today, Steven continues his work as an author and also has a ministry where he prays for others to get healed, physically, emotionally and spiritually. He and Susanne encourage everyone to trust God’s love for them so they can receive His miraculous touch too.”

Susanne shares, “God is there. Even when it don't seem like He’s there. And He hears every word that you say. God hears you. And He sees, and there is hope. And that is why Jesus is our hope.”

Steven shares, “The power of prayer is immeasurable. The Bible says all things are possible to him that believes. So if you believe, you can ask whatever you will and you will have it.”

Discover more about Steven and the books he has written at www.StevenSpellmanBooks.com. You can also email Steven at spellmanbooks@icloud.com. 

For information regarding Steven's martial arts instructor and prayer partner, please email Scott Gilbert at Savior Martial Arts: scott.gilbert@saviormartialarts.org