Explaining Santa Claus to Your Kids

"Santa's dead?" My bewildered 5-year-old's blue-gray eyes flashed hints of disbelief, and worse, betrayal.

"Yes, Hollie, but..."

"Santa's dead?!" SPLASH! SPLASH! Her tears hit the kitchen table and ricocheted against my heart.

For weeks, I practiced a brief biography on St. Nicholas while praying for help. I knew this conversation wouldn't be easy.

There once was a man named Nicholas and he lived a long time ago. He gave food and gifts to orphans because he loved Jesus very much. That's why people dress up in Santa suits today; so we can remember what Nicholas did.

It wasn't my intent to destroy Hollie's Christmas fantasy, but to grow her understanding of the purpose of the holiday. I never imagined she would surmise Santa's demise. Now, I felt like the Grinch who stole Christmas. Where did I go wrong?

My mistake was letting others form my children's view of Santa. Their grandparents had honorable intentions with their promotion of him, but I also encouraged TV shows that fed this fantasy. By letting others teach her about Santa, I ultimately allowed it to form their view of Christmas. So, how do I instill faith into my children about Christ when I've deceived them about Santa?

Start with the Original Christmas Story

It's important to build up their faith foundation. Before opening presents, we gather around our tree and read the true story of Christmas (Genesis 3:1-19CloseGenesis 3:1-19 The serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild animals the LORD God had made. One day he asked the woman, "Did God really say you must not eat the fruit from any of the trees in the garden?" "Of course we may eat fruit from the trees in the garden," the woman replied. "It's only the fruit from the tree in the middle of the garden that we are not allowed to eat. God said, `You must not eat it or even touch it; if you do, you will die.'" "You won't die!" the serpent replied to the woman. "God knows that your eyes will be opened as soon as you eat it, and you will be like God, knowing both good and evil." The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves. When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man* and his wife heard the LORD God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the LORD God among the trees. Then the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?" He replied, "I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked." "Who told you that you were naked?" the LORD God asked. "Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?" The man replied, "It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it." Then the LORD God asked the woman, "What have you done?"  "The serpent deceived me," she replied. "That's why I ate it." Then the LORD God said to the serpent,"Because you have done this, you are cursed  more than all animals, domestic and wild.You will crawl on your belly,  groveling in the dust as long as you live. And I will cause hostility between you and the woman,  and between your offspring and her offspring.He will strike* your head,  and you will strike his heel." Then he said to the woman,"I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy,  and in pain you will give birth.And you will desire to control your husband,  but he will rule over you.*" And to the man he said,"Since you listened to your wife and ate from the tree  whose fruit I commanded you not to eat,the ground is cursed because of you.  All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it. It will grow thorns and thistles for you,  though you will eat of its grains. By the sweat of your brow  will you have food to eatuntil you return to the ground  from which you were made.For you were made from dust,  and to dust you will return." OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) , Luke 1:26-38CloseLuke 1:26-38 In the sixth month of Elizabeth's pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a village in Galilee, to a virgin named Mary. She was engaged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of King David. Gabriel appeared to her and said, "Greetings, favored woman! The Lord is with you!*" Confused and disturbed, Mary tried to think what the angel could mean. "Don't be afraid, Mary," the angel told her, "for you have found favor with God! You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be very great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his ancestor David. And he will reign over Israel* forever; his Kingdom will never end!" Mary asked the angel, "But how can this happen? I am a virgin." The angel replied, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the baby to be born will be holy, and he will be called the Son of God. What's more, your relative Elizabeth has become pregnant in her old age! People used to say she was barren, but she has conceived a son and is now in her sixth month. For nothing is impossible with God.*" Mary responded, "I am the Lord's servant. May everything you have said about me come true." And then the angel left her. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) , Luke 2:1-20CloseLuke 2:1-20 At that time the Roman emperor, Augustus, decreed that a census should be taken throughout the Roman Empire. (This was the first census taken when Quirinius was governor of Syria.) All returned to their own ancestral towns to register for this census. And because Joseph was a descendant of King David, he had to go to Bethlehem in Judea, David's ancient home. He traveled there from the village of Nazareth in Galilee. He took with him Mary, his fiancée, who was now obviously pregnant. And while they were there, the time came for her baby to be born. She gave birth to her first child, a son. She wrapped him snugly in strips of cloth and laid him in a manger, because there was no lodging available for them. That night there were shepherds staying in the fields nearby, guarding their flocks of sheep. Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared among them, and the radiance of the Lord's glory surrounded them. They were terrified, but the angel reassured them. "Don't be afraid!" he said. "I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people. The Savior—yes, the Messiah, the Lord—has been born today in Bethlehem, the city of David! And you will recognize him by this sign: You will find a baby wrapped snugly in strips of cloth, lying in a manger." Suddenly, the angel was joined by a vast host of others—the armies of heaven—praising God and saying, "Glory to God in highest heaven,  and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased." When the angels had returned to heaven, the shepherds said to each other, "Let's go to Bethlehem! Let's see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about." They hurried to the village and found Mary and Joseph. And there was the baby, lying in the manger. After seeing him, the shepherds told everyone what had happened and what the angel had said to them about this child. All who heard the shepherds' story were astonished, but Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often. The shepherds went back to their flocks, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen. It was just as the angel had told them. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) , Matthew 2:1-12CloseMatthew 2:1-12 Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the reign of King Herod. About that time some wise men* from eastern lands arrived in Jerusalem, asking, "Where is the newborn king of the Jews? We saw his star as it rose,* and we have come to worship him." King Herod was deeply disturbed when he heard this, as was everyone in Jerusalem. He called a meeting of the leading priests and teachers of religious law and asked, "Where is the Messiah supposed to be born?" "In Bethlehem in Judea," they said, "for this is what the prophet wrote: `And you, O Bethlehem in the land of Judah,  are not least among the ruling cities* of Judah,for a ruler will come from you  who will be the shepherd for my people Israel.'*" Then Herod called for a private meeting with the wise men, and he learned from them the time when the star first appeared. Then he told them, "Go to Bethlehem and search carefully for the child. And when you find him, come back and tell me so that I can go and worship him, too!" After this interview the wise men went their way. And the star they had seen in the east guided them to Bethlehem. It went ahead of them and stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw the star, they were filled with joy! They entered the house and saw the child with his mother, Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasure chests and gave him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. When it was time to leave, they returned to their own country by another route, for God had warned them in a dream not to return to Herod. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) , and John 3:16CloseJohn 3:16 "For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. OPEN VERSE IN BIBLE (nlt) ). It's vital you reinforce your child's understanding of God's love and reason for Christ's birth.

Decide Early How to Handle the Subject of Santa

Many families, Christian or not, are comfortable promoting a fanciful figure as reality. After all, there's only a brief period in a child's life when she is able to believe the unbelievable with complete abandon. But what happens when they discover the truth? I wasn't afraid my children would no longer believe in Santa, but that they wouldn't believe the unbelievable, the true story of Christ's sacrifice for our sins.

After discussing my concerns with friends, I realized something I overlooked—one that allowed my children their imagination while keeping Christ at the center of Christmas. My friends presented Santa as fiction in the first place. One friend said it this way, "[My children] don't think of Santa as anything different than Big Bird or Mickey Mouse."

Don't Confuse the Fictional Santa with the Factual St. Nick

Nicholas, born into modest wealth, was taught the importance of helping people less fortunate than himself. Orphaned as a young teen, Nicholas found comfort in his faith and religious studies. Nicholas, ordained as a priest at age 19, became Bishop of Myra shortly thereafter. Nicholas was imprisoned from 303 A.D. to 308 A.D. because he wouldn't worship Roman emperor Diocletian as a god. He also encouraged his fellow prisoners to remain steadfast in their faith. Bishop Nicholas was primarily known for his kindness, generosity, and wisdom.

Discover the Truth Inside the Myth of Santa

Today's Santa is a mixture of fact and legend about Nicholas, religious traditions around the world, and the imagination of writers and advertisers. For instance, some people believe the red robes Nicholas wore as a bishop inspired Santa's suit. Though Santa is fictional, he's contributed a great deal to our Christian heritage.

Though Nicholas is not the reason for the season, the celebration of his memory played a key role in today's Christmas traditions. Communities celebrated Nicholas' memory every December 6, the anniversary of his death. When Martin Luther urged believers to refrain from honoring saints in the 16th century, Catholics, Lutherans, and Episcopalians perpetuated his memory by including St. Nicholas festivities in their Christmas traditions.

It wasn't until 1870, however, that Christmas was adopted as an official lesson plan in Protestant churches. As part of the lesson, Sunday School teachers dressed up as Santa to hand out presents as an outreach to children who didn't normally attend Sunday School.

Share with Others Less Fortunate Than Yourself

Historians credit Nicholas for turning Christmas into a gift-giving season. On December 6, people celebrated his memory by re-enacting tales attributed to Nicholas. One re-enactment included hanging stockings over the fireplace and filling them with gifts in remembrance of the time Nicholas saved a widower from selling his daughters into slavery. Legend says Nicholas snuck into their home and filled their stockings that hung over the fireplace with gold coins. Additionally, entire communities participated in the festivities by giving gifts to one another.

No amount of consoling quieted Hollie when she learned of Santa's death. In desperation, I reminded her of when we packed up her good clothes that she'd outgrown and toys she didn't use and gave them to an orphanage our church sponsored.

"See Hollie, you're like Santa when you give things away to other children who need them more than you!"

Instantly, her tears stopped.

"Really, Mama? I'm like Santa too?!" she said, her face brightened with delight.

"Yes, Hollie, you are," I nodded.

That's when I knew she understood. Christmas was not about Santa, but about Jesus and following His example in giving to others just as God gives to us.