- Stress, worry, anxiety, dread.

If you're experiencingany of these issues,

you're not alone.

The first step in getting better is what?

Asking yourself one simple question.

Are you really okay?

Debra Fileta is a professional counselor,

speaker and podcast host.

She says we all need to ask ourselves

am I really okay?

- Just because you're a Christian

doesn't mean you're healthy.

In the craziness and busyness of life,

we push through withoutever taking inventory

of how we're actually doing.

- She helps us get real

about our spiritual, emotional,

mental and physical health

and explains why itmatters in her new book,

"Are You Really OK?"

Please welcome back toThe 700 Club Debra Fileta.

Debra, it's good tohave you with us today.

- It's good to be with you again.

- You say that most of us

are not as healthy as we think we are.

If that's true, why dowe think we're healthy?

- Yeah, it's easy forus to say we're healthy.

I think social media and the world,

we kind of have a tendency

to present our best face.

Snapshots of our perfect life

and sometimes we start believingin that superficial life,

we start believing thatthat's actually true.

When we come to Jesus,

we don't automatically assumethat our cholesterol levels

are gonna be just right

or our BMI is gonna bewhat we need it to be.

But we make that assumption

with our emotional and mental health.

Sometimes we assume thatbecause we come to Jesus,

all of those things are gonna be okay,

not realizing that there'sa lot of work to do

in order to get to a healthy place.

- So are you saying then that Christians,

in particular, have ahard time getting real

about what's going on in their lives

more than other people might?

- I think so and I thinkit's because we're wired

to think that when we become Christians,

that we can't struggle.

And specifically in the area of mental

and emotional health.

I think a lot of times,

there's been myths that if you struggle

with depression or anxiety,

that means that youdon't have enough faith

or you're not strong enough

or maybe that there's evena sin issue in your life.

I think sometimes we don'trealize that becoming emotionally

and mentally healthy

is kind of like exercising a muscle.

It's not gonna be strong on it's own.

It's something that we have to work out

and practice and deal with.

- You talk about your own struggle

with panic attacks in the book.

And the people that I know

that have struggled with that,

one of the issues is theyseem to come out of nowhere.

So how should people who struggle

with this handle a panic attack?

- Panic attacks seemto come out of nowhere.

But they never come out of nowhere.

There is always a root.

And I'm a licensed counselor

but that doesn't mean I'm immune,

just like a doctor isn'timmune to getting sick.

For me, I went througha really severe trauma

many years ago where Iwent through a miscarriage

and I almost lost my life in the process.

I was rushed to emergency surgery

and when I got home

and started recovering fromthat traumatic experience,

I didn't realize thattrauma takes years to heal

and that healing happens in layers.

And so for me, a few years later

that trauma started tocome back into my life

and impact me in the form of panic attacks

and I didn't know it at the time

but a lot of those emotions

and that anxiety was actually rooted

in the past trauma that I had experienced

and there's many Christians

who have suffered pasttrauma or past hardships

and they think that those things

are just gonna go away with time

but time doesn't heal all wounds.

Only Jesus can

and we can partner with him

in the process of workingthrough these things

and getting healthy from the inside out.

- You used the word process,

so what steps can we take

knowing that we might strugglewith trauma or anxiety?

What steps can we take to get in touch

with our real emotions,

even so we can put togetherwhat you just did for yourself?

I had this happen in the past

and I'm experiencing this now.

How do we reconcile that?

- We often go to the doctor for physicals,

checkups, we get ourmammogram, our annuals,

whether or not we want to.

But how often do we stopand do an emotional checkup

or a mental health checkup?

And one thing that I reallythought was important

to do in this book

is after each section on mental health,

emotional health, spiritual health,

I stop to give you a listof important questions

to ask, such as what are the feelings

I'm experiencing in my present?

Can I name some of the emotionsthat I'm going through?

At one point, I evenhave you take inventory

of all the different stressors

in your life and give them a number

so that you can get a feel

of how you're actually doing.

Sometimes that means making a timeline

where you go back andlist the different things

that you've been through in your past

as you start to take inventory

of how they might beaffecting you in the present.

Now, for many people,

getting healthy requiresgoing to counseling

and working with a licensed counselor

to start dealing withsome of these things.

There's not a one-size-fits-allapproach for each person

but it starts with taking the time

to stop and ask how am I really doing

in this season of life?

- But also, there's a stigmaattached to that sometimes,

especially seeking counseling.

It's not just in the church,

I think it's cultural.

So how do we work past that?

How do we become justgenerally more accepting

of getting help when we need it?

- I like to think of counseling kind

of like going to the gym.

I think most people see counselinglike going to the doctor.

They think I'm sick andI needed the doctor.

Nobody wants to be sick,

no one wants to acknowledgethat they're feeling sick.

But what if we changed our perspective

and started seeing counselinglike going to the gym?

We're going to work out andexercise our emotional muscles,

our mental muscles, our spiritual muscles.

I think we would high five each other

for going to the gym

and taking the time totake care of ourselves.

And what if we were toshift our perspective

of counseling and startseeing it as the way

that we get stronger, emotionally,

spiritually and mentally?

- And I think that is God'sintention for all of us.

The book is really very, very excellent.

It's called "Are You Really OK?"

Debra's book is availablewherever books are sold.

Debra, great to have you with us.

Thank you so much.

- Thank you for having me.