(dramatic music)

- The smells, the taste,

you're listening to your guys,

and everybody's tryingto be a little jovial

but serious at the same time.

Everybody knows this might be that day.

Everybody knows.

- [Narrator] Army staffsergeant Brad Munn remembers

when that day came fora good friend of his.

It was April 26th, 2006.

Both were serving in Iraq

when Brad got word hisbuddy had been killed

by an IED while on a supply run.

- I did go to God, I sure did.

Shaking my fist.

Saying he's a good guy.

Why him, why's you do that?

(dramatic music)

- [Narrator] Ever since hewas a young boy growing up

in Florence, South Carolina,

Brad had one thought in mind.

Join the military.

- I think it was thestructure, the uniformity.

I loved America and I waslike I need to do my part.

- [Narrator] Those dreamsled him to military school

in eighth grade

where he made a commitment to Christ.

By the time he graduated in 1989, however,

he'd discovered the party life

and his faith had faded.

- I was a fence rider.

I wanted the best of both worlds.

Did I walk away?

Yeah, I did.

Did he leave me alone? No.

- [Narrator] That summer,he enlisted in the army,

his sights set on joiningthe rank of the elite.

- And they said what do you wanna do?

I was like I wantairborne, I want infantry,

and I wanna go now.

(upbeat music)

Why I became an infantryman?

To be able jumping out ofplanes wearing the jump wings.

I liked the badges and maroon beret

and being 82nd Airborne.

- [Narrator] It also became his identity.

Yet, even as he relishedin his position and status,

something was missing.

On the outside, it appearedeverything was going fine

and that's the way it was.

I didn't let people in too, too far.

I was miserable.

There was no satisfaction in my life.

- [Narrator] So after Bradreceived an honorable discharge

four years later, he was lost.

Bouncing between a couplelaw enforcement jobs

and a stint in the Coast Guard,

he went through multiple marriages

that resulted in two children.

Brad was also in and out of the church.

- Thinking that's gonna bring some peace.

It's gonna calm me down.

I'll have to make changes then

but I never did because I was trying

to find my identity in other things.

- [Narrator] Brad saysthat wasn't the only reason

for keeping God distant.

- I couldn't fight him away.

I wanted to and I tried to.

I wrestled with him often.

I couldn't let him win

because if he won,

then that means I would have to surrender.

No, I don't surrender.

- [Narrator] So in 2005, Brad reenlisted,

hoping to regain his identity.

Promoted to staff sergeant,

he was stationed in Iraq

where the constant threatof death gave him cause

to reconsider his faith in God.

- Whenever I got off shift, if you will,

I would get up on top of the roof.

I was like all right, God,

I don't know what youhave planned, I don't.

My plan's not doing too good.

I know I signed up tobe over here, I got it

but I'm not getting it.

- [Narrator] His foxhole faith

was quickly shattered

when an IED killed agood friend in April 2006

and Brad blamed God.

- Why do you say you're such a good God?

You're not such a good God for doing that.

- [Narrator] A month later,

Brad was sent back to the US

where he was medically discharged

for an old injury and PTSD.

And for the next 10 years,he drank constantly,

moving from one location to the next,

trying and failing at college.

Then after a near-fatalmotorcycle accident

that left him in a coma

and with a long recovery,

he started going to church.

- I asked God some real questions.

The doubting questions, show me something.

Then he would let me know heyman, I'm here, I've got ya.

- [Narrator] Even then,he still couldn't let God

into his life and heart.

Then finally in January of 2015,

something inside him broke.

- This particular day,

there was something thatwas stirring inside of me

and I could not shake it.

I was literally brought to my knees,

overwhelmed, and I saidGod, please help me here.

I don't know.

I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying.

Me, me, me, I, I, I.

And he said, "Brad, it's not about you,

it's all about me."

And I threw my arms up and I said,

"All right, I give itall to you as yours."

I can't do this.

I could breathe.

I was truly free.

He allowed me to see that relationship

that I'd truly been yearningfor this whole time.

I was trying to find inpeople, places, persons,

all these other things.

Whenever he was like I'm that relationship

you've been looking for.

- [Narrator] Brad was finally able

to finish his college degree,

and then he graduated from seminary.

Today he's married to Dawn,

and pastors a church inrural South Carolina.

- To anyone who has feltthat there's just no way out,

been there.

You've locked yourselfinto this little world.

You won't let anybody in.

He's still there.