- I've always had this feelingthat I'll never be enough.

- [Narrator] All his life,

Dustin Stradley struggledto find acceptance.

It started when he was eight,after his parents divorced,

and Dustin thought it was his fault.

- I felt guilty, as if I wasletting one or the other down.

I so badly just wantedmy family to be together.

So, from that point on,

I wanted to please everyone around me.

- [Narrator] Before the divorce,

they had gone to church as a family.

Now, living with his mom, andseeing his dad on weekends,

Dustin went less often.

Not that it mattered.

He'd always seen Christianity

as just a list of rules he had to follow.

- In order to have a relationship

with this God that everyone talked about,

you have to meet certain requirements.

Any time I did something wrong,

a Christian had something to say about it.

And that was my experiencewith who God was.

That He was just mad at me all the time.

- [Narrator] Eventually, hestopped going altogether,

drifting through his teen years,

bouncing from group to group,

trying his best to make friends.

- And I was trying toplease anyone and everyone,

and in the process, justtrying to figure out, like,

do I fit in anywhere?

- [Narrator] By high school,

he had found one key tofitting in was partying.

- So, I started to drink.

And I was on the wild side.

I would drink harder than most people,

and most found it humorous,

and I was the life of the party.

- [Narrator] Then, at college,Dustin partied even more.

He was arrested on a DUIcharge, his freshman year.

But that didn't keep him from drinking.

In fact, it got worse.

- I almost flunked out of college.

Just reinforced these feelings of,

I'm not good enough.

I'm not worthy.

- [Narrator] Now, Dustin wasout drinking every night.

Some mornings, he couldn'tremember how he got home.

It scared him,

and every time, he sworehe'd stop drinking.

- But I would turn back tothe bottle pretty quickly,

and start drinking again,

to numb that, and forget about that.

I didn't wanna process those feelings.

- [Narrator] Then, one morning in 2009,

while still in college,

he woke up in jail.

- [Dustin] I wasn't just in a drunk tank.

I was in a orangejumpsuit, locked in a cell,

laying on the floor,

and not knowing where Iwas, or how I got there.

- [Narrator] Later that day,he was released on bail.

After he got home,

Dustin took a long look in the mirror.

- I was disgusted with what I saw.

And so, I just,

to release the pain,

just punched the mirror,and shattered the mirror,

and fell down, and juststarted bawling, crying.

And it was,

it was a dark place.

A scary place.

- [Narrator] A couple days later,

his dad gave him a Bible with a note,

saying, "This is God's love letter."

While Dustin still didn'tbelieve God could love him,

he hoped it could be true.

So, when his roommate invitedhim to church weeks later,

he decided to go.

- The sermon was, it was incredible.

Spoken to me in a waythat I understood it,

and I felt a little bit of hope.

- [Narrator] That hope faded quickly,

as Dustin couldn't stop drinking,

even after court-ordered AA classes.

Now, he needed it just to function.

- I didn't know how to stop.

I was addicted.

I would feel sick if I didnot have alcohol in my system.

- [Narrator] A few years after college,

Dustin had a good job, withan encouraging Christian boss.

He occasionally went to church,

yet never felt good enough.

Then, finally, in January 2012,

during a revival at his church.

- I realized God loved me,

period.

Even though I did all these things,

God loves me exactly like I am,

and He wants to have arelationship with me now,

exactly like I am.

And I said the prayer,

and

I began to truly believe,

and just internally say, "God,

"I acknowledge, like, You are real,

"and

"You did die for me,"

and I felt a sense of peace.

I felt hope.

I felt for the first time

that

someone

is pleased with me,

and loves me for who I am.

- [Narrator] From that point on,

Dustin stopped trying to fighthis addiction on his own,

and surrendered it to God.

- And it went fromdrinking seven days a week,

to three days a week,

to two days a week,

to, "Why am I really doingthis in the first place?"

I felt conviction now.

I didn't know what it was.

I just knew that it wasn't guilt.

I just felt like Godwas saying, "I love you.

"Like, I've got somethingbetter in store for you."

I've been sober for eight years now,

and God has completelyremoved that desire.

- [Narrator] Now, he was atchurch every chance he got,

and today, he's the campus pastor.

Dustin says his greatest joy

is seeing people experience

the same unconditional love he did.

- I get emotional every, every week,

when I see someone pray

and accept Jesus into their life, and,

and tears are flowing down their face,

and they raise their hands,

and I think back to my moment.

And I think of how God met me right there,

and He's doing the samething for all of us.

It's not about earning more of God's love.

He loves you right now,exactly like you are.