- Well, it may be an understatement to say

that Lysa TerKeurst hasendured challenges recently.

In the last few years, shewent through colon surgery,

breast cancer, and herhusband's marital infidelity.

And through it all, shelearned that being victorious

means more than justfocusing on an outcome.

Watch this.

- [Announcer] New YorkTimes best seeling author,

and president of Proverbs 31Ministries, Lysa TerKeurst,

has recently faced some of the most

difficult years of her life.

- We've all experiencedour fair share of things

not turning out the waythat we though they would,

so what do we do about it?

- [Announcer] In her book, It'sNot Supposed To Be This Way,

Lysa shares how God was with her

during her darkest, how shesurvived, and how you can too.

- Well Lysa is here with us now,

and we welcome you back to the program.

- Thank you.

- You start your new book, It'sNot Supposed To Be This Way

with a very emotional 5:00 AM phone call.

- Yes.

- What was happening?

- I reached out to a friend of mine

because I discovered myhusband was being unfaithful.

I was shocked, stunned,

and I didn't want to make the phone call

because I knew the minuteit came out of my mouth

that it would become reality.

- [Terry] Yeah.

- But I also knew that if Iisolated in this, I would sink

- [Terry] Yeah.

- And so, sometimes whensomething so hard is happening

and your faith gets shaky,

you've got to force yourselfto call someone else,

who you know you cango stand on their faith

when you're feeling rocked in your own.

- There is something thathappens when you hear the words

come out of your mouth,- Yes.

- And you actually speakthem, what did you do then?

- Well, I didn't know whatto do, and so, for me,

I called a friend who I knowwould pray more words over me

than would speak to me or speak about me.

- [Terry] Wow.

- And she was safe.

And so, that's the only thingI could figure out to do

in those moments, you know,

because when somethingcompletely unexpected

and disillusioning is happening,you feel quite broken,

but for me, this didn'tjust make me feel broken,

it made me feel shattered,

and I wrote in the book,shattered to the point of dust.

At least broken pieces, youcan glue 'em back together,

but you can't glue dust.

But, the beautiful thing is,

my friend took me to the word of God,

and one place that Iwas reading in Genesis,

chapter two, it shocked me.

I realized, of all theingredients in the world,

that God could have chosen tomake his favorite creation,

mankind, he chose dust.

- [Terry] Yeah.

- And when he took that dust

and breathed into it, life began.

From nothing, He createdsomething beautiful and amazing,

so dust became somethingthat didn't signify and end,

it's often what must bepresent for the new to begin.

- [Terry] Yeah.

Boy that's powerful right there.

But, one of the things thatmade you feel shattered,

I'm sure, was yourministry was Proverbs 31.

I mean, having your house together

and being able to identifyit as you wanted to,

and here the whole thingblows up in your face.

You just talked about being safe, I mean,

sometimes when it comes to divorce,

the church is not a safe place to be.

- That's right.

- How did you decide,and when did you decide

to go public with it, becausethat's like another level.

- Yeah, it was hard.

I didn't want to invite public opinion

into our very private pain,

so I kept it secret for 18 months,

but then I knew a time was coming where,

either it was gonna leakout through the rumor mill,

or I was gonna get ahead of it.

The good thing is, over the years,

in leading Proverbs 31 Ministries,not just with my staff,

but even in the way thatI've written my books

and done my bible teaching,

I provided a space for grace, always.

So, and I was so thankfulthat the atmosphere

of Proverbs 31 Ministries hasalways been filled with grace,

because then I was the one whowound up needing it the most.

- [Terry] Yeah.

- So, after 18 months,I did go public with it,

and if you were to talkto Art, my husband, today,

he would say that was boththe worst day of his life,

and the best day of his life.

The worst day because everyone knew,

but the best day because everyone knew.

- [Terry] Yeah.

- And suddenly, it forcedhim to go get help,

and to get seriousabout facing his issues.

- You know, that's true of

all issues in our lives, isn't it?

When we keep them in darkness,there's a shame factor

that keeps us from healing and wholeness.

- That's right.

- So, at that point, youannounced that you were

getting divorced, now, my understanding is

that you're working on your marriage.

What happened between then and now

that brought you to this place?

- It's a great question.

It's so complicated and delicate,

but in a nutshell, there's two things

that I would want everyone to remember,

which are true about my story.

One, is the word redemption,

and one is the word reconciliation.

Those two words don't necessarily

come together and hold hands.

In my situation though,reconciliation was possible

because Art was able togo get the help he needed,

and trust is built, timeplus believable behavior,

so enough believablebehavior started to occur

to where I was willingto spend time with him,

and spending time with him again,

allowed just the beginningsof trust to be rebuilt.

But whether you're in a situation

where reconciliation is possible or not,

redemption is always possible,

because redemption doesn't depend

on the other person's choices,

redemption is a choice youcan choose today with God.

And so, redemption was alwaysfront and center in my life.

Reconciliation, I wasn'tsure if it would ever happen,

but I'm praising theLord that it is possible.

- [Terry] Yeah.

You know, one of thethings that strikes me

about going through this kindof a shattering situation,

is that the enemy alsogets us when we become

so obsessed withreprocessing in our minds,

over, and over, and over again.

I don't know why we dothat, I think we all do,

whether we're angry, orbitter, or resentful, or hurt.

How did you come to theplace where you could

put the right process atthe forefront of your mind,

because you were willing totake every thought captive,

and really hang on to what God says?

- Well, it was so hard.

I'm an over-processor,

so if you talk to any one of my children

they would say, "Mom overthinksher overthinking," right?

- [Terry] (laughs)

- And so, I am extreme over-processor,

but one situation happenedthat helped me a lot,

and it was when I had my colon issue.

My colon twisted in the middleof all of this heartbreak,

and they admitted me to the hospital,

because I was in so much pain,

but the doctors kept saying,"nothing's wrong with you."

And I laid in that hospital bed in pain

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday,Thursday, Friday morning,

finally a doctor camein my room, a surgeon,

and he said, "we finallyfigured out what's happening.

We ran one last test,and we have to rush you

into emergency surgery,or you will not make it."

And he said, "Lysa, I knowyou've prayed and asked God

to take away your pain, buthad god answered that prayer,

we would've sent you home,your colon would've ruptured,

and you would've died."

and so, I remember,right before I came under

the influence of theanesthesia and fell asleep,

and went into surgery,this thought dawned on me,

God loves me too much to answer my prayer

at any other time than the right time,

and in any other way than the right way.

And so, when my brainstarts to over-process,

I remember that moment, and I remember,

God loves me too muchfor me to think through

all the solutions and carrythe weight of being my own God.

God has a plan, so I have to surrender

those thoughts to Him.

- His yolk is easy and hisburden is light, right?

There's so much that we havejust touched on a little bit,

but I wanna say, I know manyof you are going through

difficulties, challenges.

There might be thingsin your life right now

that you're just thinking,God where are you,

or why is this happeningto me, I'm your child?

But, a lot of the answersthat you're looking for,

you're gonna find in this book.

For more of Lysa's storyand her insights, get it.

It's called It's NotSupposed To Be This Way,

Finding Unexpected Strength

When Disappointments Leave You Shattered.

This is available in stores nationwide.

Thank you for being so candid.

- Oh, thank you Terry.

- It's bringing hope and healing to many,

I know.- Thank you.