Pat Smith, wife of NFL great Emmitt Smith, discusses her new book Second Chances. Find healing for your pain and celebrate a new life.
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[MUSIC PLAYING]
God is a God of second
chances, and no one
knows that better
than Pat Smith.
This former Miss Virginia
and runner-up to Miss USA
has experienced some
extraordinarily high points
in her life and some
devastating low ones.
Take a look.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
NARRATOR: Meet Pat Smith.
She's an author, speaker,
and television host.
She's also the wife of former
Dallas Cowboy Emmitt Smith.
She might seem like
she has it all,
but Pat's journey
hasn't been easy.
She suffered through
the death of her mother,
followed by a divisible divorce
from Hollywood superstar Martin
Lawrence.
Pat dealt with guilt,
insecurity, and depression.
In her new book,
"Second Chances,"
she shares the story of how
God completely changed her life
and how he can do
the same for others.
Please welcome, to "The
700 Club," Pat Smith.
It's great to have you here.
It is so good to be here.
I mean, I grew up
around "The 700 Club,"
right here, in Virginia
Beach, so I'm ecstatic.
It's coming home, right?
I'm home.
I'm home.
It's wonderful.
It's great to have
you with us today.
You know, your
book is so amazing.
You've lived an extraordinary
life, as I said.
You've had some wonderful high
points and some low points.
And you're very
candid, in your book,
about the struggles
in your life.
What made you decide
to write this?
You know what, I kept
saying, I wish that someone--
you know, I lost my
mother very, very young,
from breast cancer--
I always said,
I wish someone had told me,
when I was around 20 years old,
that life was going to be hard,
that you're going to suffer.
You're going to suffer some
losses, and disappointments,
and shame.
But God could take all of
that, and turn it around,
and make it something so special
and so unique for His glory.
And so, for me, it's a gift.
It's a gift to other
women, other people that we
honor a God of second chances.
And really, second chance is--
to me-- it's just His grace.
Right?
It's his grace.
It's His love that, no
matter what you do, no matter
who you are, He can use you.
And we don't have to
stay stuck or in shame.
Your book isn't just
about your story.
You share, in it,
the lives of, really,
many women that you've met
along the way who've also
had places of pain,
and hurt, and wounding,
but have not just survived,
but thrived, because they've
let God take that and make
something good out of it.
---which was so beautiful.
And I noticed this.
Like, two years ago, I did
an event with Robin Roberts
in Dallas.
And it was called, Celebrating
Second Chances with Overcomers.
And that's when I
realized that every woman
that we honored--
not only Robin,
but every other woman-- they had
been through great adversity.
But they had taken
that, and now, they
were building ministries,
starting nonprofits.
They had a passion in the
area of their hurt and pain.
And I said, you
know what, there's
a unique line or thread--
There's a string
running through this.
Yeah.
Like, I see something
happening here.
Right?
And then, that's when it
gave me hope for my own life.
For so many years, like
I talk about in the book,
through a lot of
my own struggles,
I made some bad decisions,
some bad choices.
And I felt so much shame because
of it, so much embarrassment.
I came from a wonderful
family right here,
in Virginia, wonderful parents,
and grew up in the church.
And when I lost my
mother, there was a void.
There was just this huge void,
and I just couldn't figure out
how to fill it.
And so I found
myself, whether it
was seeking ambition,
or fame, or men,
trying to fill that
void-- or with things.
And I realized,
really, the only thing
that can fill that
void is Jesus Christ.
Right?
But it takes a while to
figure that out, doesn't it?
Yes.
I mentioned that you
had been Miss Virginia.
You went on and
competed for Miss USA.
You were first runner-up.
So you had that, as you're
saying, drive for significance,
really.
But you're looking for
what life is about.
But one of the problems
with that is it
puts you out in
front of the public.
Then you marry a very
well-know Hollywood star.
And when it didn't work
out, it's all so public.
How did you walk
through that time?
Let me tell you,
it was crushing.
It was very crushing.
It was very humiliating.
Because I was just coming off
of the Miss Virginia pageant,
and then, of course, Miss USA.
Now mind you, what
was so interesting
is that, because I
lost my mother, to me,
at Miss USA-- I know you
were Miss America, right--
I wanted to be Miss USA.
I was first runner-up.
For me, that was second loser.
That, to me, I felt like I lost.
Close doesn't count.
No, it didn't count for me.
Because I lost my mother.
Then, I felt like I lost
the pageant Then, of course,
I go on to get married.
That marriage doesn't work.
That's a failure to me.
We had a beautiful
young daughter.
And in the middle
of the night, I
found myself having to leave
our home-- and so, another loss.
And so what tends to happen
is that we put a mask on.
You know?
We try to pretend that it's OK.
And also, in the middle
of losses like that,
the enemy comes in
like a flood and starts
speaking these things to
your mind and to your heart.
You're not worthy.
You'll never find what
you're looking for.
You can't be loved.
How did you deal with that?
How did you get
from that to, you
know what, I get a
second chance here?
Exactly You know, it was about
a 20-year struggle for me.
And that's why I
wrote this book.
Because for me, a lot
of it is forgiveness.
You've got to forgive yourself.
Many times, I had a hard time--
why did I make that choice?
Why did I do that?
Right?
So forgiving yourself,
forgiving others-- I
had to forgive my ex-husband.
Even in your
marriage with Emmitt,
you two had things you had
to forgive each other for.
Absolutely.
That's kind of an
ongoing truth that we
need to step onto and
stay with, isn't it?
Exactly.
And you know what, I'm
so transparent about it,
and we both are.
Because I think
transparency and being real
is so important in healing.
But to me, Emmitt
was like my knight
in shining armor after
so much hurt and pain.
And I actually
put him in a place
that wasn't even fair for him.
To me, it was like, I put
them in a place of, OK,
he's going to save me.
He's going to rescue
me from all this pain.
He's my happiness.
Exactly.
But Emmitt is
human, just like me.
So he made some
choices that were not
good for our relationship
when we were dating.
And through those choices,
a child was conceived.
And we had a struggle with
forgiveness and healing
through that that took
us many, many years.
I mean, you talk about the enemy
reminding you of your past--
my precious baby,
she's now 18 years old.
I mean, she's one of my kids.
Literally, I constantly have
to fight the enemy, even today,
in my marriage of, can I trust.
Is this safe?
And I constantly
have to lean on God
and remember that we are human,
and that he has covered us,
and he has brought us so far.
It's a day-to-day journey of
locking and loading on truth,
making right choices.
Your book is called
"Second Chances,"
but you also are doing something
with and for women today
called Treasure You.
What is that?
Yes, that's my baby.
So Treasure You was
birthed, again--
First Lady Serita Jakes
told me, years ago,
that your misery can
become your ministry.
Right?
And so I learned,
on this journey,
that through all of
the difficulties,
there's a silver lining.
And that is that I
have a heart for women.
Every time that I've gone
through some very difficult
struggles in my life,
there's been amazing women
that have undergirded me.
I have a great spiritual
mentor, Kathy Moffat,
who has just walked me through.
Right?
And so I started an organization
where women come together.
And we share and we
celebrate one another.
And we inspire one another
in a safe environment,
through retreats and events.
And so Treasure You is, I
call it, my little baby.
And this Saturday, we're doing
a livestream out of Dallas.
And it's another Treasure You
event for "Second Chances"
with Wynonna Judd, who is
willing to share her story.
Because I just believe
that testimonies
are so important
to other people.
Sometimes we see people
and we think, Terry,
you're just perfect.
Never have a problem, right.
You're Miss America.
You're gorgeous.
You don't have any problems.
Well, you and I know that--
Not true.
---it's not true.
Not true.
And women, you
know, the sisterhood
that we have with each other is
a gift from the Lord, really.
It really is.
You've just got to
find the right women.
Yeah, that's important.
Let me tell you,
that is important.
That's why, like, when I
look at these reality shows,
it kills me to see women
who are fighting or going up
against each other.
Because the enemy knows
that if women come together,
it's a powerful force,
that we love each other,
that we can make things happen.
And so I think he fights
those relationships.
But you're right, when you get
together with some good sisters
and girlfriends, it's all on.
Things happen.
And one of the great things
about the book that you've
written is that second chances
are for men and for women.
It's for everybody.
I want to tell you
that this book contains
the story of Pat's life and
the lives of other women
who've all experienced
a second chance.
The book is going to be released
next Tuesday, on May 17.
You could pre-order a
copy now if you'd like to.
I recommended that you do.
And also, Treasure You,
she was talking about that.
They're going to be hosting
their first ever live broadcast
event.
That's on May the 14th,
happening at the Westin Hotel
Galleria in Dallas.
If you're nearby, take part.
Special guest Wynonna Judd
and comedian John Gray
are going to be in
attendance as well.
If you'd like a link to
the live-stream event--
can't be there, go to the
link-- just go to cbn.com.
We'll tell you how to do that.
Pat, thank you so
much for your--
Thank you, Terry.
---vulnerability
and your candor.
We appreciate what you've
said and what you've written.