AND EVERYBODY THOUGHT,

HEY, JOHN IS JUST A GREAT

CHRISTIAN GUY.

HE HAS GOT A WALK YOU CAN

EMULATE.

BUT AT HOME I WAS A

MISERABLE PORN ADDICT.

Reporter: JOHN

SCHNEIDER'S BATTLE WITH PORN

ADDICTION STARTED AS A YOUNG

BOY WHEN A FRIEND BROUGHT A

MAGAZINE TO SCHOOL.

I KNEW THAT I WAS DRAWN

TO IT.

AND WHEN I KIND OF CAUGHT MY

FIRST GLIMPSE, I THOUGHT,

WOW, THIS IS SOMETHING

ELSE.

I WANT TO SEE MORE.

IT PUT ME ON A PATH, AND I

REALIZED THAT THIS HAD POWER

OVER ME.

Reporter: HE GREW UP IN

A CHRISTIAN HOME, BUT THAT

WASN'T ENOUGH TO STOP HIS

SECRET FASCINATION WITH

PORNOGRAPHY.

I DIDN'T HAVE THE

RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD TO

KIND OF GIVE ME THAT MORAL

COMPASS THAT WOULD STEER ME

IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

SO I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO

SWITCH OFF THAT URGE, SWITCH

OFF THAT DESIRE.

THERE WAS THIS BAD THING

THAT I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO

LOOK AT.

BUT AT THE SAME TIME, THERE

WAS THIS PART OF ME SAYING,

I REALLY LIKE THIS.

AND SO I MUST BE BAD.

AND SO IT PUTS THIS WEDGE OF

SHAME BETWEEN ME AND GOD AS

IT RELATED TO MY OWN

SEXUALITY.

Reporter: AS JOHN

ENTERED HIGH SCHOOL, GUILT

AND SHAME TOOK A HEAVY

TOLL.

I WAS EXPERIENCING,

YOU KNOW, SUICIDAL

TENDENCIES, AND THINGS LIKE

THAT.

ALCOHOL, PORNOGRAPHY, THOSE

BECAME MY CRUTCHES.

THAT'S HOW I DEALT WITH THE

EMOTIONAL PAIN I WAS FEELING

IN THAT TIME IN MY LIFE.

I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE THE

PERSON THAT I WAS.

BECAUSE THE PERSON THAT

EVERYBODY ELSE LIKED WASN'T

THE PERSON THAT I SAW WHEN I

LOOKED IN THE MIRROR.

WHEN I WOULD LOOK IN THE

MIRROR, I WOULD SEE MY

FAULTS, I WOULD PICK MYSELF

APART.

Reporter: HIS MOTHER

GAVE HIM A BIBLE, AND

EVENTUALLY HE BEGAN READING

IT.

SUDDENLY THE WORD OF GOD

BECAME ALIVE TO ME.

AND IT STARTED TO MINISTER

TO THE WOUNDS AND IT STARTED

TO MINISTER TO THE QUESTIONS

I HAD AS A TEEN.

THAT WAS THE START OF MY

RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.

THAT STARTED TO CHANGE

THINGS IN A VERY POWERFUL

WAY.

Reporter: HE SAYS HE

WAS ABLE TO AVOID LOOKING AT

PORNOGRAPHY FOR MONTHS AT A

TIME, BUT IN HIS 20s, WHEN

INTERNET PORNOGRAPHY BECAME

MORE ASSESS SABLEIBLE, HE

FELL EVEN DEEPER.

THERE WAS A GREATER

PERVERSION THAT WAS OPENING

UP IN MY HEART AND KIND OF

CORRUPTING MY MIND AND, YOU

KNOW, JADING ME TO THINGS

THAT NOBODY SHOULD EVER LOOK

AT.

I WAS ADDICTED.

THERE WAS HARDLY A DAY GOING

BY -- IT WAS STARTING TO

AFFECT MY WORK AND OTHER

AREAS OF MY LIFE.

OBVIOUSLY, IT WAS A DOWNWARD

SPIRAL OF SELF-ESTEEM.

IT IS THIS VICIOUS CYCLE

THAT A LOT OF ADDICTS GET

INTO.

THEY FEEL HORRIBLE ABOUT

THEMSELVES, SO THEY MEDICATE

WITH THEIR ADDICTION.

BUT THEN THE ADDICTION MAKES

THEM FEEL WORSE ABOUT

THEMSELVES.

SO THE CYCLE JUST

PERPETUATES ITSELF.

I WAS ABSOLUTELY STUCK RIGHT

THERE.

I KNEW I WAS ADDICTED.

I KNEW THAT EVERYTHING I HAD

TRIED WASN'T WORKING.

I THINK I HAD PRETTY MUCH

GOTTEN TO A POINT OF DISPAIR

AT THAT POINT, WHERE I FELT

LIKE, CAN I EVER BE FREE?

WILL I EVER BE FREE?

WHAT'S IT GOING TO TAKE TO

BE FREE FROM THIS?

Reporter: HE JOINED

ACCOUNTABILITY GROUPS AND

BECAME ACTIVE IN THIS

CHURCH.

HE EVEN CONFESSED TO HIS

GIRLFRIEND, LISA, BUT HE

SAYS HE WAS STILL TRAPPED.

I STARTED TO SAY, I HAVE

TO GET FREE FROM THIS.

I WANTED FREEDOM FROM SIN.

AND SO I WAS TRYING

EVERYTHING THAT I KNEW HOW

TO DO AT THAT POINT TO

FORSAKE THIS SIN, BUT IT'S A

SPIRITUAL PROBLEM, FIRST AND

FOREMOST.

THE DEVIL HAS BEEN DOING

THIS FOR A LONG TIME,

TEMPTING PEOPLE FOR A LONG

TIME, AND HE KNOWS HOW TO

EXPLOIT US AND PUSH OR

BUTTONS.

SO I HAD HEART WOUNDS AND

HEART NEEDS, AND IT NEEDED

TO BE FLIPPED ON ITS EAR

BEFORE I WOULD EVER START TO

WALK IN REAL FREEDOM.

Reporter: JOHN MARRIED

LISA, BUT HIS STRUGGLE WITH

PORNOGRAPHY CONTINUED INTO

THEIR MARRIAGE.

HE SAYS IT WAS FINALLY

ACCEPTING GOD'S LOVING GRACE

THAT SET HIM ON THE PATH TO

FREEDOM.

I COMMITTED MYSELF TO

SEEKING THE FACE OF THE LORD

AND TO HAVE HIM MINISTER THE

TRUTH THAT I NEEDED IN MY

HEART IN ORDER TO SEE ME SET

FREE.

GOD WAS RESTORING THE PERSON

ALMOST, IN A SENSE, BEFORE

HE WAS EVEN DEALING WITH THE

SIN.

HE WAS GIVING ME WHAT I

NEEDED IN ORDER TO BE ABLE

TO WALK AWAY FROM IT AS A

WHOLE PERSON AGAIN.

Reporter: AFTER YEARS

OF ADDICTION, JOHN FINALLY

SAW PERMANENT CHANGES.

THERE IS A PROCESS OF

HEALING THE HEART THAT

ABSOLUTELY HAS TO TAKE PLACE

BECAUSE IF THAT HEART ISN'T

HEALED, NOTHING ELSE IS

GOING TO WORK.

SO GOD TAUGHT ME, YOU KNOW

WHAT, WHEN YOU LOOK IN THE

MIRROR, SEE YOURSELF AS I

SEE YOU.

BECAUSE I CREATED YOU WITH A

PURPOSE.

I CREATED YOU PERFECT.

I'M SO HAPPY WITH YOU.

I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.

Reporter: JOHN IS AN

AUTHOR AND PUBLIC SPEAKER

WHO NOW HELPS OTHER MEN FIND

FREEDOM FROM PORNOGRAPHY

ADDICTION LIKE HE DID,

THROUGH THE LOVE AND GRACE

OF GOD.

I'M A NEW CREATION IN

CHRIST.

OLD THINGS PASSED AWAY, OLD

THINGS HAVE BECOME NEW.

SO I GET TO ENJOY ALL OF THE

BENEFITS OF BEING A NEW

CREATION.

I GET TO ENJOY THE BENEFITS

OF FELLOWSHIP WITH HIM.

THERE IS FREEDOM, REAL

FREEDOM, WHERE YOU CAN ENJOY

YOUR LIFE, NOT

WHITE-KNUCKLING YOUR SIN FOR

THE REST OF YOUR LIFE AND

JUST, YOU KNOW, WORKING ON

SIN MANAGEMENT.

I DON'T BELIEVE IN SIN

MANAGEMENT.

I BELIEVE YOU CAN ACTUALLY

WALK IN FREEDOM FROM THIS

SIN.